Miranda Kerr's Boobs Are Worth $2.5 Million

Ok not completely true, but the Victoria's Secret model (and Orlando Bloom's wife) will model the iconic Fantasy Treasure Bra in the upcoming Victoria's Secret Fashion Show.

The bra itself, is worth $2.5 million dollars. How does a bra get that expensive, you ask? The aquamarine colored push-up bra was created by VS and Long Island's London Jewelers and is inlaid with 3,400 precious gems, including 142 carats of white and yellow diamonds, pearls, faceted citrines and aquamarines, all set in 18 karat white and yellow gold.

I have no idea what half those things are. What's a citrine? I wish there was an english translation for those of us who think that a hair-tie around the wrist counts as a bracelet.

Additionally, the bra has a dangly centerpiece tassel that features two white diamonds, each more than 8 carats, and two 14-plus-carat yellow diamonds.

Kim Kardashian will find a way to own this bra. It costs more than her engagement ring and she is not one to be outdone.

"It's such an honor to wear the bra," Miranda Kerr tells People, "And it's such a piece of artwork! It's absolutely stunning - it kind of feels a little mermaid-like - but I can't believe I'm wearing $2.5 million on my chest."

Too bad she'll have to cover it up with a t-shirt. Kidding. Anyone wearing that bra should immediately start stripping. That jewelry box they call an undergarment needs to see the light of day.

Can a dude propose to someone with this bra? Or is that tacky? You couldn't wear that many carats on your ring finger.

"We put a lot of love into this bra," the brassieres jeweler reveals, "We put a lot of our most favorite elements into it, such as the tassel - and it'll be wonderful with her walking down the runway, the tassel swinging with her body. We though about the runway show, and what would catch everyone's attention."

Kerr did not appear in the Victoria's Secret Show last year as she was pregnant with her son Flynn, so this show will be like her homecoming to VS and wearing the coveted Fantasy Treasure Bra.

"It's very special. And now I feel better than ever. I feel healthier than I've ever felt. It was wonderful to have a bit of time off after I was pregnant and having Flynn. But now I'm back in the swing of thing and it feels good."

So does the new mom and lingerie model feel like a million bucks? "I feel like more than $1 million" she jokes, "I feel like $2.5 million."